I wrote to myself a year and some months ago. Hell, I had actually forgotten it.
Finally, your letter arrived.
Somehow, at one point over the past year, I am excited to receive your correspondence ~but I have waited in agony and became oblivious of your mail.
Firstly, I am still awesome.
I still think of myself as awesome. All good. The year that was had been good to me. I am continuing the assignments you have given me. Some projects were finished, some were still on progress ~and I do not have any idea as to when I’ll finish the remaining projects. You know, it’s kinda hard as there were lots of distractions along the way.
Some months later after you composed your letter for me, I started to cut my diet by not eating carbohydrates. And that was stupid. I’ve been eating meat cooked in an unhealthy process and that made me sick. I’m taking too much protein without doing exercises. I’ve been taking vitamins and supplements without fruits and veggies on my meal. I reduced the carbs on my diet and the last thing I knew was I’m maxxing out my health card. The diet crashed me and I lose weight. I lose weight and I did not like it. My body collapsed. It took me until some months before I regained what I lost. Hell, you know I just wanted to look good.
And then I stopped blogging for a moment because of the projects slash dreams both you and I wanted. We’d give everything just to get those dreams, nah. All things are progressing according to plan but in the middle of everything, I realized I did not know what I’m doing. No, no. ~I am just having some hard times. I told myself that I wanna take some rest. Believe me, my endeavors were there but the inspirations were gone.
So I took a hiatus on everything. I removed myself from ‘my’ social networking life to be able to do all things I love. You know, it’s nice to be back living my life again. It’s nice to do laundry at night. It’s nice to clean my bedroom. And I told myself I’ll be on social networks less and less because it’s consuming much of my time that I should have been spending with every one else at home and to myself.
Yes, yes. The Cloud Project was a success once again. I was able to live my dreams again. No, no. We were able to live our dreams anew. I touched the clouds again and it was fun. Riding a plane is always fun. I remember you love clouds so much you even want to put them in plastic containers. We’ll do it again, don’t worry. We’ll do it again.
Work’s been getting harder. I felt more and more stressed ~or probably I am just making it stressful. I don’t know if I should resign or keep my job until I found another. I have no plans right now. Just trying to fix small things before deciding what I wanted to do ~long term. I had two client complaints before the year ended. One was a major complaint. Took me a week to recover.
This very moment, I have been eagerly wanting to speak with Mom about my work and my plans but I think this isn’t a good time. At least I have to wait until the household finances are stable.
Some things were out of track the past months. I’ve been having problems with my other sideline, a publishing company. I said to myself that I’ll try to settle things before the year ends but I never did. I’ve been on no-communications with them and they have been contacting me. I guess I should write them an explanation. Yeah, I owe them an explanation.
One more thing, I wasn’t able to concentrate on our projects because of this other distraction. I never regret it though. Online gaming had taken lots of time away from me. Those time wasted was all good, I swear. I was able to bond with my brother and my cousins. I would even waste more time because I would love to share moments with them.
Another good news, the Wall Project was nicely done. I’ll take pictures of it to show to the world and then the original plan will be executed ~I’ll be burning them or putting them on trash. I have to dispose them as this is an essential process that we must not be attached to worldly things. Kiddo, I know, everything on that wall is a memory. Everything in there is special. I will discard them but the memory shall remain in us.
One day of November, I thought of practicing how to sing. I did it regardless if I’m anxious or euphoric. I sang in the kitchen. I sang in the bathroom. I sang while at work. I sang my heart out. I sang because I know I’ll be good at it someday. And you are the one who taught me to never give up. I’ll continue to sing.
I am also cooking now. Experimenting in the kitchen ~giving it a try. I wanted Mom and Dad to eat good food. I would love to cook for them even just on weekends. I’ll try harder.
Fortunately, Brother has cockroaches, spiders, and scorpions under his bed. I told him to put the roaches outside because it made noises at night. And I think they made me itch. The spiders, I love them. They were gentle and they’re cool. If I became a superhero, I would want a spider for a pet to help me save the world.
Hey, old self, I am happy right now ~Despite all things happened. Sure, I’ve made mistakes. Too many mistakes but they were the beautiful and glorious kind of mistakes. I made mistakes yet I’m still awesome.
Lastly, we aren’t there yet.
But I will take you there. Don’t worry. I’ll do everything to take you there.
You are the awesomest because you made me remember that I am always awesome.
I composed that letter on September 22, 2010. Futureme.org send me my letter on the same day of 2011.
I’m replying too late because I am not yet ready to make a letter for my past self ~probably ashamed of myself not having accomplished much for over the year. 😀 It’s just cool to receive a letter from myself.
Try it. Try it. Try it. This is legit.