Roulette Generated Thoughts: Standing Over an Indelible Line Between Two Abstract Concepts

Huwag ka mag-alala, gagamitin ko ang wikang bernakular at sasamahan ko pa ito ng mga pang-araw araw na nakakasalamuhang pananalita tulad ng rawk en rol, astig, pakernut at kung anu-ano pang slung werds. Gusto ko kasing maging seryoso ang mga magbabasa nito at kung ano nga ba talaga ang magiging all-out comments nila sa seryosong usapan kung gagamitan ko ito ng pabalbal na lengguwahe. Ubusan na ito ng chakra sa pag eesplika ng kung ano ba talaga ang kayang sabihin ng mga blognism na dumadalaw sa mundo ko.

Roulette generated thoughts: standing over an indelible line between two abstract concepts. Pag-uusapan natin ang mga ideyang naka stock lang sa aking entorhinal cortex na inaagiw na ng panahon. Hindi ko alam kung cheverloo lang na nakasabit sa kisame ng aking utak pero.. mapupunta ang usapan natin sa hindi mapapawing linya sa pagitan ng dalawang bagay.

Ang tanong, paano mo ihihiwalay ang dalawang abstract concepts? Dalawang aspects of existence na sobrang garbo at kumplikado.. Hindi ito chenez lang. Hindi ito emo. At lalong hindi ito imaginary topic. Sisimulan ko na.

Love and Friendship

Pag-Ibig at Pagkakaibigan. Parehong malawak. Dalawang ideya na hindi natin kailangan ikunsulta sa diksyunaryo para maintindihan. Ineffability. Dalawang bagay na hindi natin kailangan i-define sa pamamagitan ng pananalita o sa kahit anong general language. Ikukunsiderang taboo ang paggawa ng software of emotions para sa isang robot. Kahit anong bangis ng pagpapaliwanag mo ng konsepto ng love at friendship sa isang virtual o mechanical artificial agent, hindi ka nito maiintindihan.

Eto ang catch. Ano ang naghihiwalay sa Eros Love at Simpleng Platonic Friendship? Paano mo ididistinguish na kaibigan mo pa rin siya o iba na talaga ang nararamdaman mo? Pwede ka na gumamit ng mga phrases na level-up, XP, o to the highest level. Kumbaga sa farmgame, may ibang halaman ka ng pwedeng itanim. Mga gulay na ang bunga ay heart shape.

Madali lang malaman ang pagkakaiba. Ang mahirap na parte ay yung hindi mo na mapigilan at natotorete ka na sa kakaisip ng kung ano anong gimik ang gagawin mo. Sa akin lang naman, pag handa ka ng ipagtapat yan, either you gain or lose that certain someone. Nasa sa iyo yan. Depende yan sa taktika na gagamitin mo. Bakit hindi mo patagalin. Baka naman outburst of emotions lang yan dahil nagtapat siya ng problema niya sa’yo. Ang totoo, hindi ako sigurado kung sa pagitan ng love at friendship ay may tinatawag pang isang emosyon na pwede nating gamitin sa maaaring nararamdaman ng isang tao. Parang ganito, ngayong araw na ito in lurve ka pero hindi ka naman talaga in lurve sa taong yun. Natutuwa ka lang. Tapos next day sasabihin mo, chika lang yun!

Naniniwala ako na matatagalan bago mo mapatunayan na mahal mo ang isang tao. Hindi ka dapat magpadalos dalos. Huwag kang sumugod sa Soul Society para magtalaga ng digmaan sa mga Soul Reapers. At gaya ng sinabi ko, hindi mo kailangan ng thesaurus o encyclopedia para malaman kung ano ba ang sinasabi ng iyong limbic system. Pero baka mali rin ako. Baka lahat ng sinabi ko ay walang katotohanan.

Kung hihingi ka ng advice sa akin gamit ang comment section, hindi kita pagbibigyan sa dalawang rason. Una, maraming klase ng sitwasyon na pwedeng hindi angkop ang kung anuman ang isasagot ko sa sitwasyon na kinsasangkutan mo. Pangalawa, me ganown? Ay ateh, hindi ako si Papa Jack. Tumawag ka sa numerong blah blah blah at ikunsulta kung bakit dapat ka ng makipaghiwalay sa boypren/gelpren mo.

Bang. Bang.

Sanity and Insanity

Er. Gusto ko sana i-discuss ang ineffaceable division ng aking pananaw between sanity and insanity kaso tinatamad na ako.

Free Flowing Whatever Ideas

And yes, I do not want to complicate this post with legal and medical terminologies. Besides, I am neither a medical-allied course nor a legalese. So please, do not ask too much of what I know in these two fields. Right now, I just want to write whatever-ideas.

Free flowing ideas.

It was not so long ago when someone asked me why I am here. What am I doing in this vast clumped rock floating in this boundless, three-dimensional universe? And so I answered. I told him humbly that I wanted to raise a child. But so much for that. I do not want to complicate this post by what I meant of raising a child.

What is the meaning of Life? What is my purpose? What is the sole pursuit of humanity? As what someone kept asking me one time.. Why?

Why are we here?
What are we here for?

I

The existence of organisms does not have real meaning. Because, in reality, their existence occurred out of a random chance in nature, and anything that exists by chance has no intended purpose. They are just accidentally created by a chemically-active, terrestrial planet so-called Earth. Nature gave them life and after some time, they die. Simple as that. Am I trying to associate a meaning or purpose so that I can justify my existence?

There is no point in life, and that is exactly what makes it so special. Just like free will.
If there is a reason, it’s lost on me
.

II

What is it that lies ahead for mankind if they knew the secret of this world?  Their purpose. The answer to the meaning of life is too profound, too vague to be known and understood. One will just waste his precious time looking and searching for that one thing. That one thing in exchange of one’s total lifespan. Finding that thing would mean never living at all. That is the irony of human existence.

The meaning of life is to forget about the search for the meaning of life. Live life. Love something bigger, greater, and beyond ourselves, something we did not create or have the power to create, something intangible and made holy by our very belief in it. Accept and forgive human flaws. Live it as it is. Enjoy every second of it.

Because that kilo of meat on your head is not enough to contain the wisdom of the universe.

III

The pursuit of life’s wisdom is probably my reason to search why I am created. I believe this is an adventure game like how you used to play the Super Mario Brothers or Diablo or a Tale of Two Kingdoms. Searching the meaning of life is like finishing an adventure game. You are given a mission, just like saving the princess in Super Mario Brothers. You must have a drive to wanting to see the ending of the game. Because you wanted to know the whole story.

What am I here for? To live and to die? That is the catch. Sooner or later, I must die. But there is this little dash between two dates that would be engraved in my tombstone. And that little dash is the most essential dash I should pursue. In that span of time, I wanted to know what I am living for.

I believe I have a purpose. I believe I need to finish the game.

Go back to the first sentence of the first paragraph: I do not want to complicate this post.

Oxygen as Poison Millions of Years Ago

A friend who loves lightning once said to me that cancer is the price all aerobic organisms has to pay.

Millions of years ago, oxygen was once a poison to every single-celled organisms. Basically, oxygen destroys the system of every microorganisms and prevented them from functioning. It’s a scare ~added the fact that oxygen is one of the abundant gasses in the atmosphere.

Earth was once a deadly place then~ at least to our ancestors. And within that timeframe, if oxygen entered the membrane of a cell, it embraced death. I just wonder how did the early bacteria survived this toxic airborne gas.

Call it a leap of faith.

The first successful one-celled life form has to take the risk and use it in cell division. And with that risk, mutation had started. Algae was able to synthesize this through photoysnthesis and they evolved protective enzymes for them to acquire aerobic respiration. That is why cancer cells are not present in plants.

That’s the shortcut story of our ancestors overcoming this disease ~And yes, I call that faith. Millions of years ago, our roots have conquered cancer.

YOU should conquer yours too.